Reasons
by sliceofpie
Summary: Drew Tanaka had reasons for the way she was.


Drew Tanaka had reasons for the way she was.

What she was was an utter bitch, and she knew it. Drew Tanaka had learned that was how she had to be, but sometimes the way she had to be backfired. And slowly, everything was backfiring. She felt like she was watching herself in slow motion, watching everything go wrong, one move at a time.

She went to an elite school in New York, where her father dumped her when it wasn't summer. She actually hated it there; he wouldn't let her stay at Camp year round. She supposed he got lonely, and she'd never admit that she was almost angry at her mother for leaving him so heartbroken that he'd never had another relationship except one night stands which she bared witness to, the women with their 'walks of shame' in the morning, which used to leave her hopeful for a mom and resulted in disappointment. She really did want him to be happy, but he would never be. So he kept her home, not that he spoke to her, or realised she was hurting.

She hated the school and she hated being home. So that further soured her mood, and she threw up her shield. She wouldn't let anyone in, let anyone close, let anyone know that she was a complex being with complex emotions. She didn't mind if they just thought she was a beautiful face with a rotten attitude. She'd rather them think that than think that she wasn't happy, than think that she was spoiled and had no reason to be upset.

She supposed she should thank her mother for this extreme beauty she possessed, and that oh so important talent she carried around with her, that charmspeak. At first, she too had had her reservations about it. But she also found no one listened to her if she was sweet, and nice, no matter how beautiful she was. She had to be domineering, influential, and a bitch. That was how it worked. No one listened until she made them.

That was why she put others down when she was at school during the year. If anyone so much as suspected that nothing was _perfect _with rich and beautiful Drew Tanaka, she'd deflect it on to them. Reaching out to her was like signing their death warrant; they were going down, like Sadie Kane had, like Mitchell had, like everyone eventually did. Because Drew didn't want anyone to know how much she hurt, really, during most of her life; vacant father, superficial friends (of her own making, of course, but she couldn't cope otherwise), demigod problems and the overwhelming feeling of _anger _and _being left behind. _Because she was always left behind. Because everyone left. Because nothing in her life was as perfect as her face, and she'd have traded the world for a father who seemed to care, a mother who was there, siblings and a _normal life_. But that was unattainable, she realised now.

That was why she embraced what her mother had graced her with. She was above average. The world was at her finger tips, and all she had to do was ask. And her mother actually paid attention. She had someone who understood, Silena, but she was a 'progressive' Aphrodite child and was slowly moving away.

And then she died.

Drew didn't consider her a _traitor_ for being a spy. She considered her a _traitor_ for not thinking about how anyone else felt. How Drew felt, when the only person who understood disappeared completely.

Then, Drew had to take over.

She wasn't as likeable as Silena. Silena was prettier. Silena was nicer. Drew was not, and no one listened to her, and everything came crashing down around her. It was like she wasn't at her safe haven anymore. It was like New York, all over again.

That was when she became Drew The Bitch again. She had to be cruel for anything to get done. Fortunately, it wasn't hard to inspire fear in Aphrodite kids, and it was hard for her to wish it on anyone, but the punishment of 'The Shoes' was her own invention.

She found her charmspeak hard to control. It wasn't like she used it on purpose, but her mother assured her it just came with the territory. Then, her mother stopped talking to her.

And Drew's already collapsing world completely blew apart.

Sometimes she tried to figure out what was wrong. Beautiful and powerful Drew Tanaka found school hard; ADHD, dyslexia, and a home life that made her feel imprisoned, no matter how many shoes and bags and clothes her father bought. No one listened. She was alone, she was scared, she was a demigod in a mortal world, where monsters were real and Gods didn't help. She was the Counsellor of the Aphrodite cabin, and she didn't really want it. She didn't want anyone to know anything about how Beautiful and Powerful Drew Tanaka was more of a mess than she let on. And the only person she had ever felt real, parental love from had just disappeared. In some ways, she could understand why Luke did it. Because what had the Gods _really _ever done, but leave them screwed up? And her mother was no exception behind her pretty face. Beautiful Drew Tanaka was alone, and some of it was her own making. But she didn't know how to let people know that she didn't want them to see behind her facade.

And then, Piper turned up.

Drew might not have been so hard on her, if Piper hadn't looked her over once and developed a look like she'd just stepped in something unpleasant. Drew knew immediately Piper would be one of those people; judging her instantly. Drew was like that, too, but Drew actually assessed people's characters as they went by. Drew could have easily bared her soul to Piper like she had to Silena. Piper and Silena weren't so different, but Piper was quick to make a judgement. Piper wouldn't even let Drew look at Jason without that look on her face. Drew could have looked at Leo all she wanted and Piper wouldn't have given a damn, but as soon as Jason turned up World War III broke out. And it wasn't even like Drew was going to make a big deal out of it, until Piper did.

Drew had her reasons to dislike Piper. She could have cried when Aphrodite blessed her. It was clear her mother had a new favourite, and Drew was gone. Drew had been utterly replaceable, like a porcelain doll who'd been shelved with the rest of the collection. And she felt _hurt._

Deflection mode set in again, pretending that it didn't hurt, pretending she didn't have emotions. And the nerve of Piper, to _seem to hate _what their mother provided her? Did she even understand what was happening? Her mother had left Drew alone for Piper, and Piper didn't even give two shits.

And now she was alone. Alone, again, like all the times before. And she got the feeling that she and Piper weren't so different. But she wouldn't say anything, because deflection mode set in, and Drew Tanaka had reasons for the way she was.


End file.
